316 Comments
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Letters From Amaka's avatar

Yo. I read the title and grabbed my cutlass. It's a beautiful, thought provoking piece. The way pedophiles are made the victims of the story in our community is sickening. A child is abused by an old man. And the first question is "what was she wearing?" "Maybe she's the one that was tempting him?"

It's so messed up.

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Aisha's avatar

Thank you for holding your cutlass back😂 It hit me that I could count 15-20 pedophiles in the community I grew up. Etiene and Dorcas were the girls our parents asked us to stay away from. They were 14 and even if it seemed transactional, the men were supposed to be the castrated, but the girls were the guilty party.

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Nes ☻'s avatar

The way I mentally deleted everything I was gonna say just cause of the title LOL, but it definitely grabbed my attention.

This hit deeper than I expected. It reminded me of my partner’s cousin—a teacher’s aide, no less—calling 8th grade girls “sl*ts” for wearing shorts and crop tops in the summer. As if it’s ever the responsibility of kids to manage the gaze of grown men (especially their own teachers).

People say we’re “doing too much” when we speak up about this. Honestly? We’re not doing enough when comments like that still get brushed off as normal. So thank you for writing this!

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Becky's avatar

Girl you had me at the title

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Aisha's avatar

I know I know 😂

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Gabriela Rubio Calero's avatar

The irony is a materpiece!

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Devayani's avatar

💯

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Mide’s Thought's avatar

Like.. I had to read first before I say anything 😂

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Christian Joy's avatar

Wow. In a world full of unfortunate stories, the way this was written really shows just how often pedophilia becomes part of one’s list of things happened in life— in every day life. Which is what I believe the entire point of your writing. It was tough to read and I’m positive even more tough to live through. Thank you for sharing this part of your story, I know it wasn’t easy. 💜

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Aisha's avatar

Thank you for your kind words 💜

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Rachel's avatar

I was so scared coming into this article but thank god it wasn't abt how great pedophiles are. this was raw and real. Thanks for sharing and I'm really sorry you went thru that experience :(

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Aisha's avatar

Thank you very much Rachel. I would have probably avoided it altogether if I didn’t write it. Thank you.

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Glen Anderson's avatar

Me, at 32, after asking my mother why she married him, even after telling her what happened on my "test" visit. "I told you to tell me if it happens again." Me, at 34, asking my mother what she would have done had I been a girl when her husband raped me at 10, "I'd have killed him"

Me, at 67, still as confused as that 10 year old about correct parenting. So, that title definitely holds value. Humans will justify anything, as long as it fits their own agenda, sadly.

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Aisha's avatar

Hey Glen,

All I have to say is I am sorry. I am genuinely sorry. That was a lifetime of pain, of trauma of hurt, not only from the evil act, but from the acceptance of such act by the one who should have protected you. I am sorry Glen, I truly am.

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Glen Anderson's avatar

Thank you, it did take a number of years to understand it was not my fault other than being young. Kindness rules my life, and those who oppose my choice are not welcome. Also, more importantly, thank you for writing this in a style that definitely caught the attention of some who may not have read it.

Keep on being you.

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Christian Joy's avatar

Sending you love Glen 🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵 idk what it’ll mean to you, but I prayed for you after reading this.

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Glen Anderson's avatar

Thank you, somedays good outshines bad. Keep on being good.

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tito tl's avatar

The irony in this piece is biting

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ZeeyahKim's avatar

Trust me, I was preparing to launch an attack with that title...😅

TBH, you really did justice to this. ✨

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Aisha's avatar

Since I wrote this piece, I have had my helmet on every second. Thank you!

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Miriam's avatar

everyone should read this, Aisha this is brilliant, but the title got me looking really weird at my screen for a second😭

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Aisha's avatar

Thank you Miriam. It wasn’t until I got different reactions that I realized that the title was that intense.

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Chairman Duncan's avatar

Substack rarely produces a “clever piece of writing” that is as clever as it thinks it is. This was amazing, It made me so uncomfortable in a way that only great writing can.

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Aisha's avatar

Oh, I am honored. Thank you!

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Sinners's avatar

The title got me very concerned😭 omg. A thought provoking and a beautiful piece this is!

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Aisha's avatar

I know I know. Thank you for reading despite how uncomfortable it was from the beginning.

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onyewụchị's avatar

i already knew what direction this would go just by reading the title (i trust my algorithm not to push strange content). This read really had me think about who we give grace to regardless of their actions. We can see the duality/humanity of a harmful person but that same grace is not extended to certain people . it’s interesting really

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Aisha's avatar

I love that you trust your algorithm. More often than not, we give grace to the people who ruin lives forever.

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VenEm🏳️‍🌈's avatar

I once loved someone who hurt their own child. The obliteration of our lives was excruciating

But I lost the kids of the relationship too, and that was much more traumatic.

I like the way you wrote this.

I miss my kids. And our family. Not him anymore.

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Aisha's avatar

Hey🥹

I am genuinely sorry. That’s all I can say. I am so sorry.

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VenEm🏳️‍🌈's avatar

Hugs to you. Thank you.

🫂🫂

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Deepfake with Toorera's avatar

You had me in the first half I won’t lie.

But then you held on and wouldn’t let go till the end.

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Aisha's avatar

I know I know. Thank you!

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Maeir Liv's avatar

No thoughts, just 🫶💜💜💜💜 sending all the love. You're a great writer.

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Aisha's avatar

Thank you! Sending you loads of love too 🫶🏽❤️❤️

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Sakhi Singh's avatar

man THE TITLE REALLY HAD ME HAHAHA but sending you a lot of love really <3 it takes courage to talk about this. it’s terrible that no one even bothers to talk about these things. so proud of you really <3

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Sam Jude's avatar

I am into THIS kind of writing. Subject-wise it’s sad, it’s true, it is undeniable. KEEP WRITING! You just earned a subscriber.

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